Sunday, October 01, 2006

This has been a week that I seemed to have done a lot of work, but don't have a lot to show for it. I sewed almost everyday. I just don't have a sense of accomplishment. I think there are several reasons for this. The major one being all the half done projects I seem to have covering all my work surfaces. Here is the pile of half done bags I have. I hope to finish them soon!

Do you ever dream? I don't mean REM type, I mean dream as in think thoughts of what you would like your life to be like? I seem to find my thoughts wandering towards dreams lately. Dreams of becoming a quiet, gentle lady like woman. I am not. Dreams of having a body that would walk gracefully when I moved. I do not. Dreams of having a more positive attitude on things. Mine is not always. I struggle with so many things in my life. I struggle with selfishness. Sometimes I would just love to spend the day doing things for me. Now mind you that is not how things work. I don't live out these selfish dreams, but it bothers me the same to have them. I guess my biggest problem lately is not having enough hours in my days. I seem to always have ten more things on my to do list for some one else. I remember a time when my children were younger when I could capture the moments of the day with them. I remember sitting in a rocking chair reading for hours on end to our daughter. I remember slower paced days when it didn't always seem I was rushing from one thing to the next. It hit me today that even though we do Bible study together 5 days a week we don't sing hymns anymore because we seem to have to hurry on with school work. I was trying to fit baking and walking into my days and I just don't seem to find the hours. The strange thing is we are not running the roads half as much as we did the last several years. I guess I just need to work on my priorities.

Sew Long for Now!

1 comment:

linda said...

I've found that with every new thing (baby, or starting school) things go crazy for a while, then everyone adjusts and we can get things done in a less insane pace. I'm wondering if you are just in this adjustment phase since your sugery? Now I'm not saying that now that I'm adjusted to 3 kids that we get everything done, we don't. I read soooo much more to our first. Being a mom is so hard, though - we have to die to ourselves everyday, don't we?